Comments on: my mother, the ghost

By: stormer5540

stormer5540 — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 03:59:23 +0000

I just read your story. Something about the ideal of your mother being a ghost caught my attention. Its very good and leads to the reader coming to their own conclusion. I steal thing it needed more meat on its bones.

By: Willow Fagan

Willow Fagan — Thu, 21 Jan 2010 07:14:09 +0000

Thanks, Chuk! I didn’t consciously mean for there to be a link between “Allison” and “Wonderland” but now that you point it out, I think it’s nifty. And I’m glad to hear the ambiguity worked for you.

Thanks, Cate! I know the feeling of wanting to linger in a story I really enjoy, and it’s really cool to hear that one of my stories caused that experience for someone.

Hey, Berry! Good to see you here. I’m glad that you enjoyed this story, and I value your comments as always. Oh, and thanks for the linkage from your journal!

By: Jacob Libby

Jacob Libby — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 22:17:29 +0000

There’s another dialectical turn to your compliment that the critic is the true artist, and that is that true art is necessary to inspire the critique. Though i did not directly state that I loved your piece, my involved response surely proves it. Incidentally, I produced a typo in the comment. I meant to type “eerie presence refuses to exist” rather than “not to exist” — the point being that a non-existence can be present in the form of a lingering attachment or obsession and that this neurotic displacement can blind us to real flesh and blood alternatives, as in Bjork’s beautiful lyrics, “thrust your head around/ its all around you/ just not from the directions/ you’ve been staring at.” What is so perfect and deep about your story is the way that the relationship between Allison and Brian (perhaps there is no etymological link: Allison is then the anti-illusion) is mediated through the story-dimension of ghosts and aliens. This is great because the cheap Freudian ruse of the “truth” lying beyond the appearance doesn’t convince (i.e., if you just say what they are feeling, their truth slips an ironic dimension further away!) The “truth” is the appearance, while “reality” lies unnamed and unknowable like a alien monster just out of reach. So Allison’s “definite existence refused to be present” because the ghost’s “eerie presence refuses to exist.” Once Brian lets go of the mystery of the ghosts — lets her have no meaning — Brian’s desire for Allison overflows and must be verbalized. “Ask and you shall receive” effects the merging of “existence and presence” into their full compliment, i.e. Being. There’s another dimension, too. Perhaps the lesbian sex never occurred, but was instead Brian’s courageous excursion into the heart of his worst (and most erotic) fear-fantasy — a decatastrophization that unraveled the neurotic reflexive knot of his aphephobia (fear of touching others). As is often the case, it turned out that his worst fear wasn’t as traumatic as his daily experience. Ammachi says that the greatest miracle is a change of heart. She quotes Kierkegaard on this point:

“God creates out of nothing. Wonderful, you say. Yes, to be sure, but he does what is still more wonderful: he makes saints out of sinners.”

By: Berry

Berry — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 22:02:52 +0000

A fine story, Willow. The pace built as the story progressed. Poignant. Bittersweet.

Right up my alley.

By: Cate Gardner

Cate Gardner — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 17:51:37 +0000

Wonderful characters and the story just zipped along. Though the story is perfect as is, it would have been wonderful to spend a little longer in the world. Looking forward to Mister Bumblethorn’s Coat.

By: Chuk

Chuk — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 23:38:54 +0000

Don’t know if it was intended, but I connected “Allison” with “Wonderland”.

Nice story, I don’t always like ambiguity but I think it works here.

By: Willow Fagan

Willow Fagan — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 16:47:30 +0000

Thanks, Phoebe! I’m glad that you enjoyed the story and I really appreciate your kind words about it. I definitely drew from my own experiences in college when writing the story, which probably plays a big role in the fact that it rung true for you. Thanks for linking to my story from your blog too!

Thanks, Ernest! I think that’s one of the highest compliments a writer can get, that their story stays with a reader even after they finish reading it.

Thanks, Cat! What you say about the clear writing leaving space for the ghosts and the aliens to run around does make sense. I’m glad to hear you’ve enjoyed my other stories too. I have another one coming out from Fantasy Magazine, called “The Interior of Mister Bumblethorn’s Coat”, so keep your eye out for that.

By: Jacob Libby

Jacob Libby — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 00:36:25 +0000

I like that Allison’s name is “illusion”: it fits the dialectic between 18th-19th century skepticism (can I know anything at all?) and 20th century existential-phenomenology (not ‘I think therefore I am’ but I am because fully and holistically I feel). Who is the true illusion? Brian (your?) mother whose eerie presence refuses not to exist, or Allison whose definite existence refuses to be present? For doesn’t this contrast define the dynamic between mythological faith and enlightenment doubt? What is ‘Cogito Ergo Sum’ other than the null point of our skeptical-analytical dissolution, the remainder of our being that won’t be swept away? What is Allison other than a reminder that such a pixel of life is actually the gateway to good health and humor? This meets our deepest spiritual traditions. Jesus said, “Only drowning men can see Him.” Well to put it in Allison’s words, accept that “Life is uncertainty” and you have scrapped Existence for Being. This is why with the faith of mustard seed one can move mountains. All Brian had to do was ask.

By: Cat C.

Cat C. — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 00:29:50 +0000

Hi Willow,

Awesome story I enjoyed the other stories you’ve had on this site as well. This one is my favorite thus far. I definitely felt myself getting pulled into the story, like Ernest said. Your writing was really clear and concise, which left a lot of space for the ghosts and the smoke and the aliens to run around. I don’t know if that makes 100% sense, but it makes sense in my head and I hope it translates. Anyway, really nicely done. Looking forward to more!

By: Ernest Lilley

Ernest Lilley — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 22:22:37 +0000

That’s really an excellent piece. It drew me right in and wouldn’t let go till the end. Or maybe somewhere beyond the end.